Sunday, October 23, 2011

This one time, at the Renaissance Festival..

I had a seizure. 

No joke. We went to the Renaissance Festival for my BIRTHDAY.
 For. My. Birthday. 
aaaaand.. I had a SEIZURE.

The Renaissance Festival used to be like my favorite place in the world. I absolutely loved it. It was so fun pretending to live in the Medieval Times for a day. Well, it is no longer my favorite place. I actually think it will take some time before I want to go back.

I do not have a history of having seizures.. I have never even seen a seizure happen besides in the movies. This was the first time this has ever happened and was completely out of the blue. 

Here's what happened:
Me, Andrew, and 3 of our friends were waiting in line for drinks. Given, the lines for alcoholic beverages are the longest line at the festival so there were at least 30-40 people behind us (and P.S. I had only had one beer, so don't start letting your minds wonder). Anyways, so we are about to order and I start feeling extremely light headed, very nauseous, my skin starts tingling all over, and the world begins to slowly go black. I looked around desperately for some where to sit down as I kept repeating to Andrew that something wasn't right, but there was absolutely no where to sit, and people everywhere. I stood between Andrew and my friend Tina and put my elbows on the bar and then put my head in my hands because I literally couldn't even hold my head up any longer.

All of a sudden I felt my body start convulsing beyond my control and I completely blacked out. 

When I came back to, I was sitting on the other side of the bar being fanned by my friend Logan, and an EMT was taking my pulse. Later, I found out that I had collapsed on Tina and Andrew had picked me up and carried me to the empty part of the bar and put me on it. 

After the first EMT took my pulse, 2 others followed to question me and do a few other tests. It was so embarrassing and one of the scariest things that has ever happened to me. 

The rest of the day I felt really scared, weird, and I honestly just kind of wanted a hug from my mama. I hung in there (having a horrible time) for a couple hours for the sake of my friends but then I couldn't do it any longer and finally spoke up that we had to leave. 

Needless to say, so far my 23rd birthday has been the worst birthday yet.

The aftermath hasn't been that great either. Besides the fact that I had friends come in to town and feel so guilty that I was the biggest buzz kill ever, I have been so scared ever since. A good 24 hours afterwards, and still now even, I would not let Andrew leave my sight, I just wanted to hold his hand and hug him. I hate being alone. I absolutely cannot get the situation off my mind. I keep just replaying it over and over in my head. Night is the worst, I wish Andrew and I were able to sleep together, even if he was just to sleep on my floor, even if a dog slept with me. It wouldn't matter. I just feel scared, so scared, and being alone honestly depresses me. I get extremely sad and I have no idea what to do about it. 

I haven't really told anyone this because I feel like I am being dramatic, but I can't help how I feel. All I know is that I hope this feeling goes away soon and I start to let that moment escape my thoughts. 

Time heals all wounds. 

I apologize for not having any pictures from what I thought was going to be the best birthday to date.

Does anyone have any advice or similar stories like this? I will take any sort of help or feeling of belonging.


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